Turn around

At Maddie's choir concert last night I had moment of total clarity.

She is going to leave me and I'm going to have to let her go.

The final choir sang Turn Around. You know the one ~ the one that rips your heart out with words like:

Where are you goin' my little one?

Where are you goin' my baby my own?

Turn around and you're two

Turn around and you're four

Turn around and you're a young girl

Going out of my door.

Music and lyrics are about my favorite things. They absolutely speak to my soul.

I probably sound like I'm jumping the gun or shooing her out the door. I realize it's not happening tomorrow or even next year but I watched her closely last night. I watched as she walked with beauty and maturity to the stage, I watched her sing with heart and enthusiasm and I watched as she laughed and talked and just enjoyed being with her friends.

She did turn around. . .

Once.

She waved and smiled.

So happy.

When she wasn't looking I couldn't help but wipe away a tear.

I pray that she keeps looking over her shoulder, not out of fear or embarrassment, but in the exact way she did last night. In that 'oh good! You're here!' kind of way.

An interview

Here is an interesting questionnaire I found on another blog. I interviewed my five year old Cooper:

1. What is something that Mom always says to you?
I love you

2. What makes Mom happy?
Me!!

3. What makes Mom sad?
When the kids aren’t home

4. How does Mom make you laugh?
When she says something funny

5. What was your Mom like as a child?
She was just like me

6. How old is your Mom?
13

7. How tall is your mom?
14

8. What is her favorite thing to do?
Get on the computer

9. What does your mom like to do when you're not around?
Get on the computer

10. If your mom becomes famous, what will it be for?
Being a mom

11. What is your mom really good at?
Making me happy

12. What is your mom not so good at?
Making stuff out of wood

13. What does your mom do for her job?
Be a mom

14. What is your mom's favorite food?
He stops here and asks “does this just get hardor and hardor??”
And then he says with a giggle and a shrug of his shoulders “I guess salmon.”

15. What makes you proud of your mom?
That she loves me

16. If your mom were a cartoon character, who would she be?
The yellow girl on Backyardigans because she is funny and dances a lot

17. What do you and your mom do together?
Build legos

18. How are you and your mom the same?
We both love Daddy

19. How are you and your mom different?
Mom has longer hair than me

20. How do you know your mom loves you?
Because she is nice to me

Due to his response to question #8 and #9 I am getting off the computer! YIKES!!

Sung to the tune of. . .

'Oh What Do You Do in the Summertime?'

Oh what do you do on a Saturday

When your home is torn apart?

Do you engage in a war?

Or play on the floor

Of a garage so very dir-ty?

Is that what you do?

So do we!

Oh what do you do on a Saturday

When it's hot and very stick-y?

Do you plug in the fan?

Then attach a balloon

And gaze like you're hypnotized?

Is that what you do?

So do I!

Oh what do you do on a Saturday

When your kitchen is all a mess?

Do you call it day,

Order out - HURRAY!

Then glory in work that is done?

Is that what you do?

That's what we did!

DISASTER!

Can this possibly be happening?? We finish up the second coat of paint in the playroom and move out to the hallway. We begin painting and I'm thinking - is this the right color?? It has to be. I mean come on. We handed the paint man at Home Depot the card with all the right numbers on it. It is a bit faded but I can read it. I do notice that he examines the card extra hard as he is plugging in the numbers. I think - should we double check those numbers so that what he is reading is what I am reading?? Nay. He's the paint man for heaven's sake! My first mistake was to ignore that prompting. But this is me ~ does Heavenly Father send promptings when the paint man is messing up your paint color?? Now I know that He does. We paint and paint and paint and finally we are done! Now we just move the entire contents of our home out to the garage, back porch, spare tile space, etc. and wait for the carpet. But wait, I am really thinking this isn't right. But I just tell myself it will dry and be just fine. Brent then says, "I don't think this is the right color." We pull out the old card and compare it to the new card that paint man mixed two days ago.

They are NOT the same numbers!!

Are you blank-ity, blank, blank kidding me!!

I am out of my mind crazy mad right now.

Don't stop by - I won't be nice.

Why not - while we're at it. . .

We finally made the decision to replace ALL the carpet.

They are coming on Saturday to transform the house.

We have been working since last Saturday to pack up everything

and clear each room of its entire contents. It is a TON of work

but it will be so worth it. So what do we decide to do while the

playroom/computer room is totally empty?? Paint!

And while we are at it, let's paint the hallway too.

Brent has worked tirelessly at taping and caulking. He said he

does it because I am so uptight about perfectly clean lines. I am.

But if you know my husband, he is too. So I'll take the blame

for the extra work that the taping and caulking take but I know

he wouldn't have done the job any less than perfect.

I'm a bit delirious - is it our crazy pace right or just the excess paint fumes??

At last!!

After 13 years of eating store bought grape jam (yeah, I know, ugh!) on her peanut butter toast and sandwiches, yesterday my daughter informed me she preferred the homemade strawberry jam.

Really?? How absolutely thrilling for this mom.

We were out of the store bought grape goo and her options for lunch were buy at school (I think she did this ONCE last year because standing in line highly infringes on the amount of time she gets with her friends outside at the lunch table), turkey or peanut butter with strawberry. With a sigh that only a teenager can produce, she consented to the strawberry jam.

She came home and reported that she liked her sandwich and did prefer the yummy red spread of love. Which it most certainly is - homemade love sandwiched between a couple slices of bread.

Now hopefully my boys will follow in her path and soon the grape goo will no longer have a place in our pantry.

More bright and beautiful!

In our family Christmas card of December 2001, I made the note:
The Star Spangled Banner ~ She waves more bright, more beautiful and more bold!

Take the time to drive down Cole today. You won't be disappointed. I still get shivers when I see our flag displayed so proudly.

Thanks to my Beehives and their dads (my daughter and hubby too) for getting up bright and early to post the flags. It was a perfect start to my day and I'm grateful to have shared it with you.

Red, white and blue

If you are ever looking for a fun and patriotic treat, this is super easy and yummy. Just dip your clean and dry strawberries part way into melted white chocolate and then dip the ends in blue sprinkles. Enjoy!

The PERKS!

So heading up the read-a-thon at our elementary has been quite exciting but I have to say that tonight I felt like a starstruck kid!



When the Phoenix Suns Gorilla wrapped his big hairy arms around me before his show I was a bit breathless. I seriously felt like I was meeting someone famous and that made me all giddy inside. Am I crazy??

Maybe it was the thrill of the TPing escapade that still has me all worked up. Regardless, tonight the PERKS of being in charge were pretty darn good!

Girls just wanna have fun

See what happens to those who choose not to disclose birthday information at the neighborhood BIRTHDAY celebration.

Check out these crazy pictures for evidence that 'old ladies' can and still do have fun!

Sleep ~ it does a Cooper good!

I just love these sleepy shots of Cooper.

It's what for dinner!

Kabobs turn ordinary chicken into a fun and festive luau!

Brent requested that I put on my grass skirt and coconut shells

but I decided to spare the children the embarrassment.

The sauce was so simple: 1/2 cup of your favorite BBQ sauce and

3 tablespoons orange juice concentrate. YUM!

Look Mom! Look!

Cooper was so excited to show me something he had found in his cereal. "You have to come see what I found in my cereal!" I was busy making lunches for the other kids so I asked over my shoulder, "What did you find?" "No Mom! It's a picture. You have to look at it!" I walked over and looked at this arrangement of cheerios on his spoon. My early morning brain was trying to find some sort of picture in the circles. "Mickey Mouse!" I exclaimed. It was the best I could come up with. "Come on Mom. It's Jesus!"




Hmmmm. . .
I'm just not seeing it.
But he started my
day with a mile wide
smile!

A Mighty Bear gets his props!

Davis earned his Bear badge a couple months ago. He finally received recognition and his paraphernalia at our last Pack Meeting. He is expecting one more arrow point at our next meeting as well. I love that Brent and Davis are so ambitious with this. I love that they do it together and I love that Davis sets an example for all nine year olds to look up too. As a matter of fact, I know a few Boy Scouts that would benefit as well.

Sorry! A boasting mother can be annoying, can't she!

Three things I love

!! 1 - 2 - 3 !!

Cooper and I grabbed a bite of lunch today while we were out and about. We were sitting down and enjoying the meal when a little girl (maybe 5 or 6) came in and started to climb on all the seats and benches. Apparently she wanted to leave her mark. Her grandparents immediately started hollering at her and quite the scene erupted. It seemed to go and on. I was uncomfortable as I'm sure everyone else was as well. I felt sorry for the little girl. I felt sorry for the grandparents. You could tell that this wasn't just an 'off' day or that this was a rare occurrence for them. It seemed that this was LIFE for them. I had a huge lump in my throat as I thought about all that may have occurred in this family's life to bring this about. I was sad. I looked at Cooper as he observed the "not easy to take your eyes off of" explosion. He was sitting nicely and behaving well. Finally the sad little family left in a rush of yelling, kicking and dragging. My vision was blurred when Cooper looked up at me and whispered, "I think that little girl is sad." I nodded my head. No matter how much I swallowed, I couldn't get rid of the lump in my throat. I felt grateful for my little family. We aren't perfect by any means but by and large happiness is at the forefront of it all.

What is it about batter bowls and beaters??

IRRESISTIBLY YUMMY

AND 100%

CHILDHOOD GOODNESS!!

Cooper could hardly wait for me to get the brownie

batter into the pan so that he could have this

delightful indulgence all to himself.

Big sis and brother were at school.

And beaters are best when shared with Grandma!

Maddison is two years old and my mom is sixty years young!

A little drama

As corny as it may sound I just have to say it:

Brent is my Sam.

I know, I know! Corn!

You may recall this easy to love character from The Lord of the Rings. He was Frodo's faithful companion and served him tirelessly. Even when Frodo was mean and hateful, Sam never wavered (okay, once he ditched grumpy 'ol Frodo but he did return and save his life) and walked the perilous journey to Mount Doom with him. I happened to catch the very end of The Return of the King late last night with Brent slumbering beside me. After making it through last week with Brent standing ever ready, I was reminded how lucky I am. And he proved himself again when a laundry basket that seemed bottomless, was miraculously empty.

Okay, so I'm all for a little drama but I'm such a sucker for a happy ending!

Moments

Homemade bread and jam are just about as close to heavenly as you can get but a warm embrace of pure love is what clears the skys and brings heaven into view.

Rainy shoulders

I know this isn't news for anyone but just my own musings. Sometimes life feels like a downpour! It comes down hard, fast and relentlessly. Coming up for air seems impossible and so you just keep your head down and lean into the onslaught. At times like this it is hard to look outside myself. I'm not very good at finding the rainbow amidst the storm. Such were my selfish thoughts last week when I read my cousin's blog. The 'weather' in her neck of the woods was similar to mine. She said I could share with you. She lives on a large farm and among other raindrops falling down upon her she wrote this:

When I went to get the mail today, I was noticing how badly the alfalfa needs to be cut and how ragged the lawn looks. I was wondering what we are going to do about the Johnson grass in our garden plot and how we are going to afford the fencing that we want to put in so we have more pasture land. I looked at the weeds choking the electric fence line and wondered when we would ever have time to kill those off and get the electric fence working again. I wondered what possessed us to think we could handle a farm. I guess it has just been one of those days.
I came in the house and did something I hardly ever do--I turned on the tv. There was a talk from the 2006 Womens Conference on the BYU channel and the speaker told of a time when she was praying to have her burden lightened because she just couldnt carry it any longer. The Spirit whispered to her that she was praying for the wrong thing. She needed to pray for stronger shoulders to be able to carry the burden.

I was grateful to read Melanie's words. It was a slice of the rainbow I needed to see. And one of the wonderful things about being 41 years old, I do know that weather patterns like this come and go. I also know that a heavy rain is cleansing. It washes the dust and dirt away. So as the rain falls I'll look through the pelting drops and pray for stronger shoulders. What a beautiful perspective. Thanks Melanie.

Tagged again

Here's what I'm supposed to do: list 3 joys, 3 fears, 3 current obsessions/collections, 3 surprising facts and then tag 5 other people.

JOYS

1. Ben & Jerry's New York Super Fudge Chunk (I've noted this on my blog in several other places. It must bring great joy!)

2. music, music, music

3. the fact that when I stand wrapped up in Brent's arms, I fit exactly under his chin.

FEARS

1. the dark

2. being alone

3. drowning

CURRENT OBSESSIONS

1. Edward

2. Lifesavers - the orange mint ones!!

3. ER - the final season begins September 25th

SURPRISING FACTS
These are no surprise - I'm such an open book!

1. hate to dust

2. love a good laugh

3. love good a read

I'd love for anyone to play along but I'll officially tag only one - come on Collette! You can do this! I'm here to help if you need it.

My birthday song

Here is a link to find the #1 song that was rockin' the airwaves on the day you were born.

On my birthday it was "Penny Lane" by the Beatles.

Leave a comment on my blog and let me know what your official "birthday song" is!!

After a big day

Great conversations should always begin

with a yummy treat and a glass of cold milk.

Ours did!!

Here we go again!

Another school year!

This year Maddie heads off to 8th grade.
I vow to enjoy this.
Next year means high school
and I feel quite faint when I
let my thoughts go there.

Davis is off to conquer 4th grade.

Both were excited and full of confidence

when they headed out the door.

A kiss for both and there they go.

Kindergarten for Cooper.

Is it possible that he is ready for this?

Or is it me - yeah, it's me.

I don't think I'm ready for this.

We walked hand in hand to school.

He was holding on pretty tight

but then again, that might have been me.

After waves and hugs of good bye

he got in line and listened very carefully to the

teacher's instructions. . .

which were to stand tall and straight like a pencil

and to put a bubble in your mouth and hold it there

while they walked to their classroom.

He walked away tall and straight as a pencil.

He glanced over his shoulder at me a few times

but then again, that could have been me.

When I in awesome wonder. . .

Walking through these groves of giants
made me feel like a tiny dot on the
timeline of eternity.

Pictures do not do it justice
but I tried to capture a little
of my AWE.

Words of a beautiful Hymn floated through
my mind and whispered to my heart.

The Giant Redwoods are meant
to be experienced by everyone.
Put it on your list of things to do.